Starry-starry dreams

This is dedicated to all the men I had in my life...An ode to you simply because you once existed

They say to write well you need to write what you know..well this is what I know.

I'm only 24 years old (Yes,I take the liberty of saying 'only'),yet I've seen more than I should,more than my mind can comprehend,more than I could possibly take.

Infidelity,Physical Abuse,Mental Trauma were fancy important sounding words that I always heard..was warned against..even pondered upon..but never thought I would encounter.

I don't want to glorify my life,I don't want to compose songs on the unfairness of it all,come to think of it maybe just maybe I'll write a book on it someday...but all I want to do right now is just pack my bags,forget everything that I know and go back to the time when the solution to any problem was holding my Mom's hand,when it was ok to bawl my eyes out and I could be cheered up with something as simple as the batter of some gooey chocolate cake,when feeling insecure was not considered a weakness but rather a reason to be hugged and held tight.

Yes,I grew up believing in Happily ever-afters,so what wrong did I do.All I want is to give my all,all I crave is for somebody to want that all.

With each of you,too many times I've let my life come to a standstill.

But now I feel that a chapter is ending,now I can see a new day dawning,I did love you maybe because my love for you was pure.I did miss you maybe because I belonged to you with my heart,but I can't be beaten,broken and defeated anymore.

For I don't want to fall but rise in your love...

I've been heartbroken,rejected,dumped and even duped..but every morning I wake up wanting to be who I am even more..

Yes you caused me unbelievable pain and for a while I lost my reign,yes you tore me into pieces and maybe for a bit I was never the same, still this heart yearns to hope and has started to heal again,in some ways I'm broken but that was only an impetus to be brand new again.

I still hope,I still crave,I still yearn without any discerning breaks..and yes I still dream my starry-starry dreams